It
may be uncomfortable to have an intimate encounter with someone for
the first time after you lost your mate through divorce or death. You
may have had one partner for many years. Intimacy can be very
hard with someone new after many years of being with one partner. It
is hard but exciting to adjust to getting intimate with someone new
and different.
Look back at your sexual encounters during your youth. Many
questions went through your mind such as, " Will I satisfy
my partner? " Will I be rejected by my partner when they see me
naked? "Will they like me for who I am ?" Understand that
your feelings about sexuality has not really changed over the years.
The difference maybe that the body has changed, and maybe we are not
as agile as when we were young. However, we are the same person with
the same thoughts and feelings.
Go back to your
memories of when you may have asked these same questions. Try to
remember how you dealt with these issues. Look at your feelings
towards intimacy and sex; now, it is time to be more opened minded.
Here are some helpful tips from EroticElders.com.to enjoy the intimate
sexual encounter with a new partner.
1. Self-doubt: Your
partner wants to be with you. Get over the feelings of
self-doubt. Your new partner is there because they want to make
love to you.
2. Think of this
intimate encounter as something new and exciting. Set the mood with
soft lights, soft music, maybe a book of poetry or erotic stories.
3. Touch each
other. This will enable you and your partner to explore each other
without taking your clothes off. This will help you get a
feeling of comfort with each other.
4. Savor taste:
When you kiss, savor the taste of your partner's lips and tongue. Kiss
their ear lobes, and the nape of the neck. Sweep your lips up and down
their neck. Maybe start to undo a button or two.
5. Smell their body
aroma: close your eyes and smell their sweet smell of love. Start to
imagine the wonderful things that you and your partner will be
engaging in soon.
6. Whisper some
endearing words to your partner. Tell them what You want them to do to
you in the love department.
7. Tool box for
sex: This is optional but great to have. The tool box for sex should
have the basic tools: condoms, lubrication, massage oils, feathers,
erotic stories, etc., (Always use your imagination to add to the sex
tool box.)
8. Sense of humor:
Your partner will enjoy being with someone that has a sense a humor.
Laughter is a real turn on.
Always remember, if
you don't succeed the first time, the fun is to practice with your
partner for the second time.
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